John and I have a tagline for any ridiculous and/or awkward happenings that occur during our married life together:
“They don’t tell you about THIS in premarital counseling!”
It’s a great way of dissauding any threatening outbursts of frustration and it makes us laugh uncontrollably when we ought to be crying, which often does lead to tears of laughter (read:lunacy).
It’s in those moments where instead of griping or grumping about each other’s “uniqueness” we choose to laugh.
And you know what I’ve noticed?
Mutual laughter paves a natural road towards acceptance and, when necessary, forgiveness.
I wish I could say we do it EVERY time we encounter such circumstances, but we both know that isn’t true. 😉
Some snapshots into the marital madness:
– Me waking John up with my snoring (how’s that for breaking stereotypes? Oh, and did I mention he wears earplugs?)
– John’s OCD dishwasher loading technique (really, it’s impressive but not when YOU just spent 10 min loading the dishwasher… Know what I’m saying? 😉 )
– John setting the stove on fire (yep.)
– Me purchasing and then promptly forgetting about, several pounds of ground beef. I, um, discovered it in the back of our fridge weeks later. ($13 worth of meat by the way. This is a favorite story of John’s)
– Dutch oven. (need I say more?)
– John running the washer without putting in any detergent. (this has happened more than once which makes it even better)
– Me scraping one of our car mirrors on a parking garage pole. (I thought it’d be nice to add a touch of red to the blue!…no?)
– And the most entertaining ones will forever remain between the two of us. (as it should be, trust me.)
John and I have both shaken our heads in bewilderment at the other’s quirks and mishaps on numerous occasions. We’re learning that becoming one means fully accepting the other. I can’t only have the parts of John that mesh smoothly and comfortably into my way of doing things and vice-versa.
We’ve also noticed a trend:
Quick and sincere forgiveness in little things makes it easier to accept and grant forgiveness in the bigger things.
“bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”
– Colossians 3:13 –
So, while John may cringe as I set a bowl in the dishwasher (RIGHT where the cups should go) and I walk by the washer a few times “just to check”, I’m thankful that (for the most part) we choose to laugh and, by God’s grace, forgive.